4: Thirty Years a Pawn

I grew up in the LDS faith. I did everything that was expected of me. I graduated seminary. I went on a mission. I got married in the temple, all that I was supposed to do. The biggest thing that they tell you not to do, is question the faith. I have spent too many years being taught in school to question things. There are almost always multiple ways to come to a correct conclusion/answer.

I had many questions in my head about the church. Many of those questions came up while I was serving as a missionary, trying to convert others to the church. I was told that I would have to “Take it on faith,” or that “We won’t know these answers in this life.” Those answers are bullshit, there are answers out there, maybe they haven’t been found yet, but there are indeed answers.

I started reading. I started with stuff right from the churches website. Turns out, there are multiple other people that had similar questions to what I had. The church has even posted some essays on their website addressing some of these questions.

The first one that I read dealt with a question I came up against repeatedly on my mission, the church’s stance on the African American people, or those with “African heritage.” Needless to say, what I read went against what I was told to relay to people that I was teaching. The church has gone back on the narrative that I was instructed was the only proper explanation.

I continued to read these essays, and continued to find areas where I was lied to, and in turn, lied to every person that I talked to on my mission. It was then that I started to open my eyes, to see that the church that I once held so dear, was nothing more than a business. I made up my mind that I was not going to be a part of that business any more. I was now on a new path, one that has led me to answers to questions that I have always had, answers that cannot be found in the LDS church, or any other organized religion that I know of.

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www.nowlookingforward.blogspot.com
www.reddit.com/u/anyonehaveanswers